EU | Parliament Heroes Reward Themselves for Heroic Saturday Attendance

BRUSSELS / STRASBOURG – In a stirring display of sacrifice and public service, members of the European Parliament have quietly extended eligibility for a €359 “attendance allowance” to those brave enough to appear at Europe Day celebrations on May 9 - a Saturday.

Normally reserved for actual parliamentary workdays, the allowance will now also apply to “public events,” ensuring that lawmakers are properly compensated for the immense physical and emotional burden of appearing near a flag and possibly applauding.

French MEP Fabienne Keller reportedly informed colleagues by email that they simply need to sign in to qualify for the payment.

“Democracy is hard work,” said one parliamentary insider while heroically considering whether to attend the ceremony before lunch or just sign the sheet and leave. “You can’t expect elected officials to sacrifice their Saturdays without at least a small symbolic gesture of €359.”

Officials confirmed that a parliamentary working group is already reviewing whether the allowance should be increased to account for inflation and the rising cost of ceremonial appearances.

“Europe Day is about unity,” one staffer explained. “And nothing unites legislators faster than a shared allowance.”

Meanwhile, European citizens are encouraged to celebrate the EU’s founding values by attending local events, waving flags, and continuing to pay the taxes that make such heroic parliamentary sacrifices possible.

Source: https://x.com/kaeferboeck/status/2032514515645116640

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